XMen Evolution: The Pirated Version
by Link and Luigi
Summary: Join Captain Xavier, his wench Storm, First Mate Scott and the rest of his crew on this series rewrite as they as they struggle to voyage across the seas while fighting for mutant pirate equality!
1. Strategy X

Canon in D

Episode 1

Strategy X

One day, the pirate ship, '_X-Men_' was sitting in dock about to sail out into the Bayville Sea.  A member on the ship, Duncan Matthews, was more of a pretty boy than a sailor and everyone knew this.  Especially the first mate who goes by the name of Scott Summers.  Even though Scott finished his work on time and had a higher rank than Duncan did, usually the wenches would go to Duncan.

There was one lass in particular who was Scott's favorite, Jean Grey.  But, as usual, she had been wooed into loving Duncan the cabin boy.

To make matters worse, Duncan and the rest of the cabin boys often filtered out all the thieves that attempted to stowaway on _X-Men._  There was a certain thief who constantly seemed to try to hornswaggle the ship that everyone had gotten used to calling Toad.

Duncan caught Toad just outside the boat, attempting to board.

"Let's crush him, Dunc!" cheered one of the cabin boys who worshipped Duncan like an idol.

"Let's NOT, Dunc." Said Scott as he rounded the corner.  Scott didn't care for fighting, especially while the Captain was currently away and left him in charge.  He would much rather see that Toad was to walk the plank as opposed to beaten to a pulp.  Duncan knew how Scott favored Jean, so he decided to pick a fight and, since the Captain was away, he knew that he would most likely get away with it too.

However, this first mate has a special quality, for he is a mutant pirate and, even though they only look like simple eye patches, those patches actually keep Scott from blowing everything he looks at up.  No one really questioned why Scott would wear two eye patches at the same time since it seemed to work for him because he never would really bump into anything.  It must have been magic.

The fight began.  Toad escaped off the ship and left Scott to defend himself against the cabin boy, Duncan.  Duncan didn't know that Scott was a mutant pirate and Scott had no intention on letting him ever find it.

"Me and me hearties were gonna squash that scalleywag!" Duncan said angrily when he realized that Toad had gotten away.  "And you and your two stupid eye patches ruined that!"

Scott barely suppressed the urge to blow Duncan up just as Jean, the lass, came around the corner.

"No!" she yelled.  "Stop!"  This distracted Scott momentarily so Duncan ran up behind him and punched him in the face, knocking his eye patches askew.  This caused red rays to shoot out of his eyes and destroy a small piece of the town.

Authorities came to the scene, wondering what had happened as Scott covered his eyes in attempt to stop it.  Jean was also a mutant, you see, and she had the power of telepathy and telekinesis.  She helped Scott with his patches and the two fled to the ship.

"What happened here…?" said a puzzled authority figure as he tried to figure out the events leading up to the disaster.

Luckily, it was that time when Captain Xavier arrived.  Well, Captain Xavier is ALSO a mutant pirate and he is a very powerful telepath so he used his abilities to make the authorities think that something else had happened.  Captain Xavier also has two peg legs, which is a bit ludicrous so he just got a specially made wheelchair.  The cabin boy, Duncan, got out without serious injury but had little memory of the fight.

Meanwhile, Captain Xavier stood before his great ship, his wench, Storm, by his side.  "Things are under control…" the captain said to Storm.  "For now.  But we better hurry.  _Germany _will be docking any time now."

He and his wench moved down the port just as the ship _Germany _began to unload.

Just offshore an island, 'Market', located not too far away, the ship _Wolverine _docked to collect some information.  The captain on that ship was Captain Logan and he too was a mutant pirate known for his healing abilities and indestructible skeleton.

"What's the latest?" Captain Logan asked the man at the dock.

"Disaster at Bayville." The man answered.

"Bayville, huh…?" said Captain Logan thoughtfully.  Little did Captain Logan know but he was being watched by a strange pirate who no one knows the name of…

Back at _X-Men_, Scott stood outside Jean's quarters.  "Give it up, Jean, it's hopeless!" Scott called, knocking on the door.

"Almost done!" Jean said.

"We're gonna be late!" Scott said, sounding annoyed.  "The ship is casting off tomorrow and I have to make sure everything's all set!"

Jean opened the door.  "So, are we going or what?" she asked as she walked past him and made her way to the deck.  Scott followed her and on their way there, Captain Xavier stopped them.

"I would like to see both of you in my quarters." Captain Xavier said.  "I'd like you to meet someone."  Scott and Jean entered Captain Xavier's captain's quarters to see a hooded figure in the corner.  "This is Kurt Wagner.  He arrived earlier today on _Germany._"

"Hi Kurt!" said Scott, putting his hand out.  "I'm Scott, the first mate.  This is Jean, the lass."  Jean waved.

 Kurt didn't say anything at first, but then he put his hands out and everyone was shocked to see that it was blue and he only had two fingers and a thumb!  AVAST!!  Kurt could see the surprised expressions on everyone's faces so he quickly put his hand back in his pocket.

Captain Xavier cleared his throat.  "I was just telling Kurt that I began this voyage in search for gifted youngsters that I could make into fine pirates." He began.  "Gifted as in people with gifts that are not always an asset…right First Mate Scott?"

"So…you heard about it?" Scott said nervously.

"Hard not to." Captain Xavier said.  He turned to Kurt.  "Scott's eyes emit a destructive optic blast beam.  That's why he's wearing those specially made eye patches."

"Sink me!" said Kurt as he pushed his hood back to reveal that he was all blue and fuzzy.

"What about you, Kurt?" asked Jean.  "Are you a mutant pirate too?"

Kurt then disappeared in a puff of smoke and appeared on the other side of the room.  "Maybe." He said.

"Shiver me timbers!" gasped Scott and Jean.

"I'm going to help get Kurt settled in." said Captain Xavier.  "He's going on the account."

Meanwhile, Toad the Scallywag was attempting to get on a different ship.  He had decided to give up on _X-Men _and attempt another.  On his first stop, he struck gold.  This ship was called _The Brotherhood_.

"Toad?" said the Captain of the ship who, surprisingly, was a female.  "How about we talk a little bit about Scott Summers, the first mate on the Pirate Ship _X-Men._"

"What about him?" asked Toad.

"We need to know more about him and the rest of the crew, including Captain Xavier." The Female Captain continued.

"I don't wanna…" started Toad.

"Avast!!" yelled the Female Captain as she began to morph into a giant purple dinosaur like creature.  "You'll do as you're told!  Understand?!"  You see, this Captain was also a mutant pirate who went by the name Mystique.  She had to ability to change her appearance so she could look like anyone or anything she wanted to.

The next morning, Captain Xavier and Storm the Wench went to show Hand Kurt his new quarters.

"Sink me!" said Kurt.  "This room…is mine?"

"Of course, Kurt." Said Captain Xavier.  "That's why your captain sent you to us.  Because he knew you'd be happy here."

"Happy?" sighed Kurt.  "How can I be happy if I look like this?"

"I have a surprise for you." Said Captain Xavier as he took a bandana out from behind his back.  "Put this on."

Kurt put the bandana on his head and, to his surprise, he transformed into a regular looking person!  "Sink me!" he exclaimed.  "I can't believe it!  I'm… normal!"

Captain Xavier and his wench decided to leave Kurt with his happiness and new quarters.  He looked around for a bit until he came across a small box.  Inside the box were nicely folded pirate garments.

Scott, the First Mate, was trying to make a few last checks on the well being of the ship and all its hands.  That's when he came across Toad the Scallywag.

"Ahoy, Summers." Said Toad as he flipped up onto a large crate that was being boarded onto _X-Men_.  "What's up?"

Scott looked around to see that no one was currently watching.  "That's quite a jump." He commented, starting to get the idea that maybe Toad was a mutant pirate as well.

"Well, as you can see, you and I got something in common." Toad said.  "We ain't like other pirates.  We're different."

"You're point is?" Scott said, now definitely assured that Toad was a mutant pirate.

"I just wanna talk." Said Toad.  "Get to know each other better."

"I'll think about it." Scott said, walking away.

"Sure, you think about it." Said Toad.  "I got other stuff to do."

Captain Xavier was sitting in his captain's quarters mapping out their route to continue their voyage when he suddenly looked up and put down his compass.  He wheeled around the corner to another secret room.  He looked at a map of the world that was in front of him to see a small red dot had appeared right there in Bayville.

"Hm…" said Captain Xavier just as he got a telepathic message coming from his first mate.  _"What is it Scott?"_

_"It's one of the land lubbers here." _Scott said.  _"He's…kind of like us."_

_"Yes."_ Said Captain Xavier as he placed a giant bushy hat with a long feather coming out of it on his head.  _"The Scallywag, Toad."_

_"You know him?"_ Scott said, confused.

_"Cerebro just got a reading on him."_ Captain Xavier answered.  _"He must be using his powers out in the open now."_

_"Anyway…"_ Scott said.  _"He's not the kind of lad I'd like to share quarters with.  Let me put it this way, he's got the personal hygiene of grog."_

_"We cannot turn our backs on anyone." _Said Captain Xavier.  _"I'll speak with you later."_

Just then, Kurt entered Captain Xavier's secret room dressed in his pirate garb that was given to him.  "What's that thing, Captain?" he asked, referring to the bushy hat.

"This thing is Cerebro." Said Captain Xavier.  "It detects the manifestation of mutant powers.  That's how I found you."  Captain Xavier then used his telepathy to contact his wench, Storm.  _"Storm?"_

_"Aye Captain?" _Storm answered.

_"I wonder if you could…audition someone for me." _The Captain replied, for he knew very well that Storm was a mutant pirate as well with the ability to control the weather.  Actually, most people on his ship were mutant pirates with the exception of the occasional swab or wench.

Storm knew that just outside was Toad the Scallywag so she quickly donned her pirate garb and took flight.  Their ship was to leave that very night and they had to know for sure weather Toad would be joining them on _X-Men _or not.

Toad leapt from the dock to the ship with ease.  As he wandered around on the deck, Storm flew overhead and used her mutant pirate abilities to blow Toad into the actual quarters of the ship.

Kurt was in the quarters and was bowled over by Toad when he was blown in.

"Blimey!" said Toad when he saw Kurt and they began to circle each other.  "What are you supposed to be?  Some kind of squiffy?"

Kurt sniffed the air.  "The name's Hand Kurt!  And at least I don't wreak like unwashed lederhosen!"

"You scurvy dog!" yelled Toad as he leapt at Kurt but Kurt just teleported away.  Toad paused and looked up to see Kurt clinging to the ceiling.

"As you say on these pirate ships," Kurt said.  "Arrr!"

"That ain't gonna help you, dog!" yelled Toad as he leapt at Kurt again.

Kurt easily dodged.  "You're so slow!" he said as he began to climb away on the walls.  Toad glared at him angrily and followed right after him.

Storm landed back on the deck and entered the quarters just as Captain Xavier wheeled in.  "Yes…" said the captain.  "Toad is indeed gifted.  He could very well be a mutant pirate like us."

"Sometimes Captain, I feel your good heart blinds even you from the truth." Storm said as the two watched Kurt and Toad hop around on the walls and ceiling, breaking things in their path.  

"Belay there!" Captain Xavier called.  "This test is over!  Todd is, in fact, a mutant pirate!  He is welcome to join us on our journey…if he so desires."

"The only thing I DESIRE is this scurvy dog's head!" yelled Toad as he jumped at Kurt.  In surprise, Kurt accidentally teleported both of them down to the belly of the ship which was also called, 'The Danger Room'.

"Sink me!" said Kurt.  "Where are we?"

"You asking me, dog?" asked Toad.  "You brought us here."

"And I think I'm about to regret it!" said Kurt as a bunch of cannons came out of the sides of the ship and pointed right at them.

Captain Xavier knew just what was happening.  _"Scott, Jean!" _he said telepathically.  _"Hand Kurt and Toad the Scallywag have teleported into the Danger Room!"_

"Shiver me timbers, the Danger Room has automated defenses!" said Scott to Jean.

"It'll attack them with everything its got!" Jean said.

_"Get in there!" _commanded the captain.  _"NOW!"_

Jean and Scott smartly put on their pirate clothing and ran off to the Danger Room where cannons and gun shots were being fired at Toad and Kurt from all directions.  "I've got the cannons!" Scott declared to Jean.  "You keep them clear of everything else!"

Scott began to fire at the cannons, destroying one by one.  Jean used her telekinesis to move Kurt out of the way just before a sword was thrown at him.  The four of them continued to brave the Danger Room until Captain Xavier and his wench finally came to the control room and ended the simulation by entering a special code.

"Sink me!" said Kurt.  "I get it.  It's a training area!  See?"  He then approached a cannon and tapped it a few times but, oddly enough, a cannon ball shot out of it and just barely missed hitting Scott and Toad.

"Forget this man!" said Toad as he hopped out of the room.  "I have seen enough!  I am outta here!"

"Toad!" called Scott.  "Sorry, Captain.  I couldn't stop him."

"It's all right." Said Captain Xavier.  "He wasn't ready to accompany us on our voyage."

"I blew it too, Captain." Said Kurt.  "I'm sorry.  You've been wonderful but I guess…I just don't belong here."  Then Kurt teleported away.

"Kurt, belay there!" called the captain.

"No sweat, Captain!" said Scott.  "I'll take care of it."

Toad jumped off the deck and landed very ungracefully on land where he was greeted by a man who shot metal hooks out of his hand.  "Going somewhere, lubber?" said the man.  He was wearing a big captain's hat.

"Ahoy, Captain Logan!" said Captain Xavier.  "Let him go."

Captain Logan looked, at first, disappointed but eventually cleared the way so Toad to get through, retracting his claws as well.  "I came back here because I smelled trouble brewing." Said Captain Logan.  "Of course, it could just be bilge water over there."

"I wish it was." Said Captain Xavier.  "Welcome home, me heartie.  We missed you."

Captain Logan tipped his hat to the elder captain.

Hand Kurt teleported into another part of the ship that he had not yet explored.  He was faced with a smaller vessel entitled, _X-Jet_, which, just by looking at it, he could tell would practically fly across the water.  "Sink me…" muttered Kurt.

Scott entered just then.  "She's nice, isn't she?" he said, referring to _X-Jet._

"Very good!" said Kurt.  "Is it yours?  Please tell me you get to fly it."

"It's ours." Said Scott.  "And if you stick around for a while, I show you how to pilot this scallywag.  So what do you say?  You want to be part of our crew?"

"We have a deal then!" said Kurt.

"Welcome to the crew!" said Scott.  "Come on, I'll show you where they hide the grog."

We take you back to _The Brotherhood._

"I can't believe this!" yelled the enraged Captain Mystique.  "You were actually inside and you ran away?!"

"Hey, I lost me head!" said Toad.  "I did what I could!"

"GET OUT!!" yelled Captain Mystique.  Toad quickly left the room as Captain Mystique threw her own temper tantrum.  Suddenly, a voice came from outside her quarters.

"Don't be too hard on the boy, Captain." Said the voice.  "We don't want to thin our ranks so early in the voyage, now do we?"

"Aye, Captain." Said Captain Mystique.  "I'll be more careful."

"Right you are." Said the voice.  "Remember, this is only the beginning."


	2. The XImpulse

Episode Two

The X-Impulse

There was a lass by the name of Kitty Pryde who had something special about her.  For some reason, one night while she was sleeping, she woke up to find herself in the room below her bedroom with her bed sheets half way falling through the ceiling.

She lived on the island, Northbrook_, _which was a very peaceful one where pirates usually didn't dock, especially not mutant pirates.

Hand Kurt was late for report AGAIN.  He hurried along, stuffing one remained of his breakfast in his mouth.  He accidentally almost crashed into their female overseer, Madam Darkholme.

"Late again!" she scolded.  It was her job to catch all the hands in bad acts that the captain shouldn't have to trouble himself with.  Little did everyone know that she was actually the pirate, Mystique, Captain of _The Brotherhood_.  "Do I have to tell the Captain about this?"

Just then, Scott came around the corner.  "There you are!" he said, grabbing Kurt's arm.  "The Captain's been wondering where you were!"

Captain Mystique glared at the two as they left.

Northbrook was experiencing good weather except things were out of the ordinary for Kitty.  Her parents didn't want to talk about it and she certainly didn't either so she silently tried to head off to school without their knowledge.

Captain Xavier and Lass Jean were riding speedily on the _X-Jet_ coming closer to the small island of Northbrook.  "Why just me?" asked Jean.  "Why not everyone?"

"Because you're the one who can connect with this lass." Captain Xavier answered.

"Blimey, I hope so." Said Jean.  "But what about that other lad?"

"Aye, Lance Alvers." Said Captain Xavier, scratching his chin.  "Allow me to handle that landlubber.  I want you to concentrate on the lass's parents since we are requesting to take her on our voyage for mutant pirates."

The docking process was quick and painless since any ships seldom came into Northbrook.  The lass and Captain had no trouble finding Kitty's residence and getting some time to speak with her parents.

"What are you talking about?" asked Kitty's mother.  "How do you know Kitty?"

"Please, may we come in for a minute?" Jean asked.  "We can answer all your questions and anything--"

"Excuse me, Lass, you can talk to us out here." Kitty's father interrupted.

"Very well." Said Captain Xavier.  "I think you know that Kitty is going through a very unique transition.  We simply want to help her through it.  Why don't you tell us about last night?"

"Last night is none of your business!" said Kitty's father.  "Please, just leave us alone!  We don't want our daughter to become a mutant pirate!"  Kitty's parents then entered their house and slammed the door behind them.

"Aye." Said Jean.  "Next time, let's just call and get hung up on."

"You'll need to make contact with the lass directly…at her school." Captain Xavier said.

Meanwhile, on _X-Men_, Captain Logan was swabbing the decks simply because they were dirty and he needed something to fill his time with.  Suddenly, he heard the sound of an approaching vessel.  He stood up and looked over the edge of the water.

"Blimey…_Sabretooth._" Logan said as he watched the ship _Sabretooth _come into view.

Captain Logan knew that it was his duty as a guest on the ship _X-Men _to lead _Sabretooth_ away from it.  He donned his pirate garb and boarded a smaller ship without a name, going off to meet up with the captain of the opposing vessel.

Kurt observed all this from the crow's nest and teleported down to Scott.  "What's up with Captain Logan?" he asked.

"He was hanging the jib, that's for sure." Scott answered.

"You want to follow him?" Kurt said.

"Let's go." Said Scott with a grin as he led Kurt to wear the small vessels were kept.

"Should we take _X-Van_?" Kurt asked, pointing to an ugly vessel that didn't look like it would move very fast.

"Uh…I was thinking more along the lines of _Cyclops_." Said Scott as he leapt over to a brightly colored sleek little ship.  Kurt didn't argue and eagerly hopped in as well.

Kitty didn't feel right at all that entire day.  

"Look at pity Kitty." Said one girl to another.

"She's such a messdeck lawyer." Commented the other.

"Let's give her some time off." Giggled the first as the two sneaked up behind Kitty and shoved her in her locker.

"Let me outta here!" screamed Kitty as she pounded on the door while the girls ran away giggling.  "Let me outta here you swabbies!  Open this door!!  Somebody open this door!"

The halls were empty, though, so no one really heard her.

It was just by chance that a swab might just so happen to wander by.  His name was Lance Alvers and he had once sailed the seas but not anymore.  Now he stayed on Northbrook wreaking havoc wherever he could.  Today, he was cutting up the hallways of the school with a cutlass, just because he could.

Kitty heard the slashes and began knocking her locker again.  "Ahoy, who's out there?" she called.  "Can you hear me?  Let me out!"

Just as the swab passed by her locker, Kitty suddenly fell right through it and landed on Lance who tumbled to the floor.  Kitty was amazed as she recovered from her fall, but then she remembered that Lance had seen everything.

"Sink me!" said Lance.  "You see what you just did?"

"What?" Kitty said.  "I just fell out…"

"Yeah, lass!" said Lance.  "Right through the wall!"

"You're crazy!" said Kitty, backing away.

Lance grabbed her arm and stopped her from running away.  "No, no!" he said, trying to calm her down.  "Avast!  I'm the one corsair around here who gets the beauty of it!  Cause you're just like me!  Really!"  Kitty looked at Lance skeptically.  "Aye, then!  Gangway!"

Lance clenched both his fists and concentrated hard.  The entire school began to shake and the lockers opened, spilling their contents on the floor.  Kitty gasped in surprise just as Lance stopped.  He had shaken the world.  "Getting the picture?" he said to Kitty.

"No!" said Kitty.  "You're just like some…Jack Tar!  Leave me alone!"  Kitty ran off.

"You can run, but you can't hide." Said Lance as he simply watched Kitty leave.  "Cause I'm gonna rock your world."

Kitty arrived to gym late while Amy and Riley laughed at her expense.  The gym instructor blew her whistle.  "Pryde, you're late." She said.

"Sorry, I had locker trouble." Kitty said, glaring at Amy and Riley.

"All right, you three." Said the gym teacher.  "Pryde, you're tardy so you're first."  Kitty regrettably made her way to the long jump area.

Lance and his two mateys scaled the school to the roof.

"Avast!" said the first matey.

"Shut up ya scurvy dog!" said the other as he punched the first in the shoulder.

"What now, Alvers?" asked the first to Lance who was watching the gym class take place.

"Can't you just…you know, make a door?" asked the second matey.

"Aye, and have them know we were in?" Lance said sarcastically.  "They'll change the test!  I got a better idea."  He pointed at Kitty.  "That lass."

"Blimey, she gonna long jump through the wall?" asked the matey.

"You two scallywags just line up the customers…I'll snatch the answers." Lance said.

Kitty was never very good at long jump.  In fact, she wasn't good at all.  And, in short, she fell on her face.

"Take notes, Pryde, this is how athletes do it." Said Riley as she got ready to jump herself.

Lance wasn't about to allow Riley to put down a considerable lass so as soon as she began to run and jump, Lance began to shake the world and which threw the sand up into the air and knocked Riley onto her rump.  Kitty gasped and looked at Lance who only waved at her from the roof of the school.  She ran away as fast as she could but crashed into Jean on the way.  Instead of stopping, she just kept running.

She wandered aimlessly around by herself and threw a temper tantrum.  However, when she reached out to catch something she had dropped off a shelf, it passed right through her hands.  When she bent down and touched it again, however, it was solid.  So, she decided to test out her new found abilities by concentrating on making her hand go through the bowl.  And it did.

"Kitty?" came the voice of Jean the Lass.  "Kitty, are you all right?"

Kitty stood up in surprise.  She looked Jean up and down.  "That rah rah Riley a friend of yours?  Cause I had nothing to do with what happened out there in the sandpit."

"I know, and I'm not Riley's heartie." Said Jean.

"You like you'd be." Kitty said.

"I know what's going on here." Said Jean.

"You don't know anything!" Kitty yelled angrily.  "And neither does that creepy guy out there!"

"Who, Swab Lance?" said Jean.  "This is about you.  You and your wonderful new gift."

"Look, I don't want any of this!  It's just hard enough being normal, you know?"

"Kitty, I want you to watch me for a second." Said Jean as she began to use her telekinetic powers to pick up the things that Kitty had thrown around the room.  Kitty watched in awe but then she realized something.

"You're a mutant pirate!" she yelled.  "Stay out of my head!!"  Then she ran off, leaving Jean alone.

"Kitty, avast!" Lass Jean called.  She felt a tap on her shoulder and turned around to see Lance standing there.

"Piece of advice, Red!" said Lance.  "I'm the only matey that lass is gonna need!  I'll be teaching her what's what so you just back off!"  He pushed past the lass and walked by her.

Kitty opened her locker and pulled her books out, still attempting to go about her normal life and keep her mind off the mutant pirates.  She turned around when she was being loomed over by the shadow of Swab Lance.

"Avast!" said Lance.  "I won't shake things up!  I promise!  I'm uh… my name's Lance.  We should really talk."

"Why can't everyone just leave me alone?!" Kitty demanded.

"I've learned how to control it." Lance said.  "Meet me outside the office in an hour.  I'll show YOU how."

_"Sounds like the swab could be trouble…"_ Captain Xavier communicated telepathically with Jean.  _"If he bonds with the lass, we may not be able to reach her."_

_"Aye, Captain, I agree, and he IS reaching her." _Jean told the captain.

_"You'll have to stay with her, Jean." _Said Captain Xavier.  _"I don't want to loose this lass.  Remember, any obstacles that get in the way, you can overcome them.  Captain out."_

Back in the waters around the _X-Men_ Hand Kurt and First Mate Scott scouted the area for any sign of Captain Logan in the nameless ship.

"Sink me!" said Kurt, dropping the rigging.  "We've lost him."

"Hey, watch the rigging!" Scott said, grabbing the rigging the Kurt had dropped ever so carelessly.

"There!" Kurt said, pointing at a small island off in the distance.  "There's two ships docked there!"  He pulled out his binoculars.  "One is _Sabretooth _and the other…a nameless one!"

"All right!" said Scott as the two sailed to shore.

Captain Logan looked around for the captain of _Sabretooth_.  It didn't take long because the captain jumped out and presented himself, immediately attacking Captain Logan with a long cutlass.

"Unfinished business, scallywag." Uttered the captain.

"Bring it on, lubber, bring it on." Said Captain Logan.

The captain lunged toward Captain Logan, sword drawn but Captain Logan sliced the sword in two, making it utterly useless.  The nameless captain threw the broken sword aside.  Then the two began to fight with fists and whatever they could pick off the small island whether it be rocks or uprooted trees.

"One shall fall by the other's hand!" said the captain.  "It is our destiny!  We cannot change it!"

"I didn't know you went for that philosophy bilge!" said Captain Logan.

"Hey landlubber, I got your destiny right here!" came the voice of First Mate Scott as he zapped the nameless captain with his laser eye vision.  The captain recovered and then began to attack Hand Kurt who had also arrived but Captain Logan pushed the nameless captain out of the way before he could inflict any damage.

The nameless captain jumped off a nearby cliff and dove into the water.  Captain Logan watched him fall with an angry expression.

"Arr!" said Kurt.  "We showed him!  We're the X-Men!"

"I don't fight your battles so don't fight mine." Said Captain Logan to Hand Kurt and First Mate Scott.  Captain Logan then stormed off.

"Sink me, he loves us." Said Kurt with a shrug.

"Aye." Said Scott sarcastically.

Back at pleasant island of Northbrook, Swab Lance was waiting outside the office for Kitty, just like he said he would.  It wasn't long before Kitty actually did show up.

"…How do you take control?" she asked nervously.

"By admitting something that no one wants to cope to." Said Lance.  "That we are mutant pirates.  That there is something wrong with us."  Kitty lowered her head in shame.  "Avast, don't fret it.  Embrace it!"

"Nothing is making any sense…" whined Kitty.

"That's why I be here!" said Lance.  "To light your path!  And the first step leads us right into the office."

Kitty closed her eyes and concentrated, not knowing exactly why she was trusting Lance, a mere swab, but she phased through the wall and then unlocked the door so Lance could enter freely.  "Did you see me?" Kitty said happily.  "Did you?"

"Aye!" said Lance.  "Shiver me timbers, Lass!  How did it feel?"

"Oh it was…unbelievable!" said Kitty as she hugged Lance happily.

Outside the office, Captain Xavier and Lass Jean were waiting for Kitty's parents to arrive.  They arrived in moments.

"Where's Kitty?" her father said anxiously.

"She broke into the office." Jean answered.

"She's never done anything like this before!" said Kitty's mother.

"You go with Lass Jean." Said Captain Xavier.  "I'll catch up."

Lance searched the files for the test answers.  "Ha!" he said.  "Test answers present and accounted for!"

"That's what this is about?" Kitty said, looking betrayed.  "Hornswaggling?"

"Avast, this scurvy school uses tests like these to keep us down, lass!" said Lance angrily.  "No more!  We take control!"

"This doesn't feel right!" said Kitty.  "I changed my mind!  I wanna go!"

"Avast, avast!" said Lance, grabbing Kitty's arm.  "What are you doing?  Come on, Lass."

"Let go of my daughter!!" came the angry voice of Kitty's father.

"Far enough, ya squiffy!" said Lance as he commenced in his famous shaking the world abilities.  One of the bookshelves in the room came tumbling down on top of Kitty's father.  Lass Jean and Kitty's mother gasped.

"Daddy!" Kitty called.

"Forget them!" said Lance.  "Blimey, I'm bringing this place down!"  He continued to shake the world and the building began to crumble.  Lass Jean used everything within her power to keep the building up but in the end, it didn't do them any good.  The building ended up tumbling down anyway because Kitty had escaped from Lance, and he was one unhappy swab.

Using her mutant abilities, Lass Kitty told everyone to grab onto her and they all phased through the rubble until they were safe back outside.

Captain Xavier watched on in silence, anticipating what was going to happen next.  He was very relieved when everyone came though unharmed.  "Aye, Lass, it IS a gift." He commented.  "And you've used it well."

"Daddy, mutant pirates…they…want to help me." Kitty said.  "I trust them."

"I know, beautie, and so do I." Said her father as he turned back to Captain Xavier.  "Captain, I think we have some things to talk about."

"Aye." Said Captain Xavier.  "We do."

Lance looked on to the rubble and he knew that he wouldn't be able to go back to that school.  He knew that he would probably have to leave Northbrook all together.  But how?  And where would he go?

"I'd say you've blown your chances at this school, haven't you?" said the voice of Captain Mystique.

"And you are…?" Swab Lance said.

"You're new Captain." Captain Mystique replied.  "I've made an opening for you in my crew on _The Brotherhood_.  I have much to teach you my young sprog."


	3. Rogue Recruit

Episode Three

Rogue Recruit

On the ship, _Caldecot,_ very far away from the _X-Men_, there was a party going on.  This was not a regular pirate ship like the _X-Men,_ it was actually a dance party ship where pirates would go to have a good time.  It was a humungous cruise ship that the passengers would be staying on for a week or so.

Rogue was a lass looking over the water's edge out on the open deck.  She didn't care much for dancing, and you could tell just by the clothes she wore.

Two maties, Cody and another, came out on the deck.

"My good buddy Cody is now a swabbie." Said Cody's mate.  "Gone in an evening from bad to sad, flame to lame.  Nurse, he's coded!  Personality paddles, stat!"

"Blimey, I'm just picking my move…taking it slow." Cody answered.

"I've seen squiffies move faster than this, Cody!" said Cody's bucko.  "There she is.  The lass you've been staring at all night!  Please tell me you at least know her name!"  Cody shrugged absentmindedly and his mate slapped his forehead.  "You scallywag!  This ends now!"

He grabbed Cody and pulled him over to where Rogue was standing.

"Aye, can I help you?" Rogue said, turning around.

"Dance…I mean…would you like to?" Cody said nervously.  "With me, that is.  Together."

"I'm really just hanging out here…" Rogue started but once she saw the hurt look on Cody's face, she decided to dance with him.  Cody slapped his mate five on the way to the dance floor.

Back at Rogue's cabin, her adoptive mother, Irene, sat idly by.  Irene was blind but she had been a mutant pirate in her younger days so she had the special ability to see the future.  All she saw was Rogue suffering.  "Oh my dear lass!" she gasped.

Back at the dance, Rogue was having a good time and Cody was having a good time.  But he accidentally knocked Rogue down and, while helping her stand up, grabbed her by the arm.  Then, something strange happened!  The two felt a strange sensation come over them for a moment or two before Rogue wrenched her arm away from Cody.  He immediately collapsed to the floor.

Rogue's head was filled with images of when Cody was a lad and all the things he had done.  "My head!" she whined.  "All these images!  What's happening to me?  What am I?  Who am I?"

Irene was calling someone up.  "That's not what I said…" she argued.  "I see pathways…probabilities!  I predicted what form her mutant powers would take, not when they would manifest!  Of course, I know you're coming.  And the others?  The ones aboard the _X-Men_?  They are coming too."

The _X-Men _wasn't quite on its way as Irene had said.  A masked man had somehow made his way into the ship and now it was Wench Storm's job to get him out.  He had hid in the cargo area.  "Testing me…hm?" Storm said.  "Very well.  It's time you remember why they call me STORM!"

Storm flew into the air and created a fierce well…storm I guess.  The ship flooded with water and the masked man was carried out of the cargo area into plain sight.

"You look a little flushed," said Storm.  "And the forecast isn't good."

"Avast!" came Captain Xavier's voice.  "Captain Logan, that is enough."

The masked man took his mask off to reveal that he was, in fact, Captain Logan.  "Aye, when I give a demo, I give a demo." Captain Logan stated.

"What was the point?" First Mate Scott asked.  The rest of the crew was hanging around in the captain's quarters as Captain Logan and Wench Storm entered.

"Sink me, I give it two thumbs up!" Hand Kurt said from his position hanging upside down. 

Lass Kitty shivered.  "Is it just me or is anyone else seriously freaked by all this?" she asked.  Everyone stared at her blankly.  "Aye, it's just me?  Blimey."

"Relax, Lass, you'll be fine!" said Kurt as he teleported next to Kitty.  "We're right beside you!"

"Blimey!" she shouted.

"Yarr…sorry." Said Kurt sheepishly.

"Whatever…" said Kitty.  "Ahoy, maties, it's late.  I'm gonna go have a clap of thunder."  With that, she phased through the floor and was gone.

Kurt looked disappointed.  "Sink me, she's fully not into the Fuzzy Mate." He said sadly.  "Not that I really blame her."

"She just needs time, Kurt." Said Lass Jean, putting her hand on Kurt's shoulder.  "She'll come around."

"Crew, we have an emergency." Said Captain Xavier.  "First mate, assemble the whole crew.  We weigh the anchor immediately."

"Aye, Captain." Said Scott.  "What's the mission?"

"Cerebro has detected a new mutant pirate aboard the party boat, _Caldecot.  _My mental impression from the scene indicated a very disturbed lass.  Our mutant pirate is a danger to herself and possibly those around her.  X-Men, we have a Rogue."

The entire crew boarded the _X-Jet _as to get to _Caldecot _faster.  "Anchor away, wind is steady." Kurt reported from the captain's helm.

"Shiver me timbers, Kurt, you'll make a navigator yet!" said Scott.

"Thanks!" said Kurt as he leaned on the steering wheel.

"Or…maybe not…" Scott said.

"Scott seems so…together!" said Lass Kitty to Lass Jean from the back of the _X-Jet_.  "So cool and…he's kinda cute."

"Cute?" Jean said.  "A scurvy dog, maybe.  Belay there…you know…at a certain angle…"

"Kids." Said Captain Logan with a groan.

Captain Mystique had already transferred ships onto _Caldecot_ and was meeting up with Irene.

"You made good time, Captain." Said Irene.

"Our ship's mysterious Captain has certain resources, Irene." Said Captain Mystique.  "What happened?  I left the lass in what I thought was your safe keeping!"

"She accidentally made physical contact with a local lad." Irene responded.

"We cannot lose her, especially to Captain Xavier!" Captain Mystique said.  "You can see the future, Irene.  Where will she go?"

"Home." Irene answered.  "Or…what she thinks is home."

Rogue was wandering down the hallways, attempting to find her room.  She came across what she thought was hers, when it was actually Cody's.  She discovered an extra key in where she remembered it to be hidden and opened the door.

"Is this really necessary?" Captain Logan said to Captain Xavier as they all waited outside the infirmary area of the cruise ship.

"Yes." Said Captain Xavier.  "This lad, Cody, is the key to finding our Rogue.  But he's unconscious and his mind is elusive.  To isolate his memory patterns, I need someone on the inside."

Lass Jean was that one on the inside and, dressed as a serving wench, she was able to get close to Cody so Captain Xavier could read his mind.

Irene and Captain Mystique approached Cody's quarters.  "Now what?" Irene asked.  "You won't hurt her, will you?  After all, Captain, she's your--"

"I know." Captain Mystique interrupted her.  "She will come to us willingly, given the right incentive." She then morphed herself to look like Captain Logan.

Rogue sat inside Cody's living quarters, looking at all the booty he had stored in there.  "All this is…mine?" she wondered.  She looked in the mirror.  "But which me am I?"  The door flung open and Captain Logan was standing there.  "Ahoy!  Who are you and what do you want?!"

"You, lass, I want YOU!" Captain Logan shouted, charging at Rogue.  Captain Logan whipped out a handgun and shot it at Rogue but luckily Captain Logan's aim wasn't exactly top notch so he missed.  "Stand still and make it quick!  You're dealing with the _X-Men _now!  You ain't got a chance!"

"_X-Men_?  I don't understand!" Rogue said.  "I just want you to leave me alone!"  Rogue hurried past Captain Logan and out the door of Cody's room, rushing down the hallway.

But, AVAST!  She didn't even notice when Captain Logan transformed to Captain Mystique and then to Wench Storm.

"One more clap of the thunder and you'll be on the account." Said Captain Mystique/Wench Storm as she followed after Rogue.

"So does this chase or what?" Lass Kitty groaned and she, Hand Kurt and the REAL Captain Logan made their way down the many hallways of the Pirate Party Boat.

"The Cap. says the lass's mind is confused and difficult to pinpoint." Said Captain Logan as he opened a door to one of the rooms only to find it empty.  "So keep looking."  Then he smelled something as he shut the door.

"What?" asked Hand Kurt.  "Overhaul a scent?"

"Aye," said Captain Logan.  "I smell fear."

"One well placed lightning bolt…" said Captain Mystique in the guise of Wench Storm as she threw a fire cracker at Lass Rogue.  "One ex-mutant pirate."

Rogue screamed and ran around the corner where she ran into Irene.

"Rogue!" said Irene.  "It's me, Irene!  Try and remember!"

"Who?" said Rogue.  "Irene…Irene…aye!  But… I'm so confused!  Strange thoughts in my head!  People overhauling me!"

"Easy, easy, matey." Said Irene.  "The _X-Men _will not risk a confrontation."

"The _X-Men_?" said Rogue.

"Yes." Said Irene.  "The crew aboard the _X-Men _are mutant pirate hunters!  Avast, heave to!  I have a matey who can help you!"

"All this is happening so fast…" Rogue began but then she turned around to see Captain Logan, Lass Kitty and Hand Kurt on their way up the hall.  "It's him!  The one who blackspotted me!  Run, Irene!  Run!"  And in her haste, Rogue ran off but accidentally left her glove behind.

"That's gotta be her!" panted Captain Logan as the three ran by Irene and after Rogue.

"Please, leave me be!" said Lass Rogue as she ran into a room and slammed the door behind her.

Hand Kurt teleported in front of Captain Logan.  "Captain, avast!" he said.  "The lass seems to be terrified by you!  Let me try."

"Okay, sprog, just don't mess up, harr?" said Captain Logan reluctantly.

"Aye Captain!" said Kurt, saluting him.

"I'll go find the Cap." Said Captain Logan.  "Oh and sprog?"  Kurt spun around.  "Put on your best face.  No sense freaking the poor lass anymore out than she already is."  Kurt put on his bandana so he now looked like a regular person as opposed to his usual mutant pirate self as Lass Kitty ran after him.  "And keep an eye on the wench, here." Captain Logan added.

"Blimey!" said Kitty angrily.

Kurt teleported into the room where Rogue was.  "Ahoy, bucko!" he called.

"Shiver me timbers!" gasped Rogue.

"Belay there, don't be frightened." Said Kurt.

"What do you want?" asked Rogue.

"Wench?" mumbled Kitty as she phased through the wall and spotted Rogue.  "I'll show him.  She doesn't look so tough…" With that, Lass Kitty leapt onto Rogue, knocking her right off her feet.  While Kurt attempted to help her up, she accidentally knocked off his bandana, thus revealing his mutant pirate form.  This, of course, started Rogue to an overwhelming extent so she freaked out and touched his face inevitably gaining his power to teleport!  Which she did.  Leaving Hand Kurt there to collapse and Lass Kitty there to deal with it all.

"Kurt?!" Kitty said as she tried to shake him awake.  "Kurt!"

Rogue teleported to the deck of the ship.  "What happened?" she asked.  "Where am I?  Und ich kann Deutsches sprechen?  I can speak German?"  Lass Rogue began to think that she was catching on so she started having fun with teleporting until it landed her right on her rump.  Literally.

"Say something, Kurt!  Please!" pleaded Kitty.  "I have to get in touch with the Captain!  _Captain!  Captain!!"_

_"Lass Kitty?  Not so loud.  Slowly, please.  Order your thoughts."_

_"It's Kurt.  She hurt him.  She did SOMETHING to him."_

_"Stay there, Lass, help is on its way."_

Captain Mystique walked about the deck.  No one was there because the rest of the ship was party-hartying the night away inside.  She spotted Rogue.  Just when she was about to make her move, she ALSO spotted Lass Jean approaching Rogue.

"Ahoy." Said Jean to Rogue.

"Do I know you?" asked Rogue.  "The memories…I'm so confused…"

"I know, I can accord to what you're going through." Jean said.

"Lass Jean…you're Jean!" said Rogue, standing up.  "You're like the rest!"

"Avast!" said Jean.  "If you know who I am then you know I won't chase you.  Blimey, it's tough to go it solo.  We can talk anytime."

Rogue saw just as Wench Storm and First Mate Scott came around the corner.  Since Captain Mystique had attacked her wearing the form of Wench Storm, Rogue believed that she was now looking at her attacker!  "Not you!" Rogue yelled as she ran away.

"AVAST!!" yelled Scott as he tried to stop her but was unsuccessful.

Rogue ran towards the aft of the ship, trying to get as far away from the crew of _The X-Men _as she could.  But, First Mate Scott was quick on her tail.

"Thought you could escape, could you?" he said.  "The _X-Men _don't leave loose rigging!  Dead men tell no tales!!"

Rogue ran away but, oddly enough, crashed into ANOTHER First Mate Scott.  In her confusion and fear, she pushed First Mate Scott down and his deadlights shot one of the masts of the ship, knocking it over.  She ran back to where she had come from only to be faced with Lass Jean.

"I tried, I REALLY did but some squiffies just won't be helped!" Jean yelled.  Rogue screamed and teleported away so she was back at the fore end of the ship where she was greeted by Jean.

"Are you all right?" she asked.

Rogue backed away right into Wench Storm, accidentally touching her skin which made her take her powers thus sending Storm careening into the wonderful land of unconsciousness where she would join hands with Kurt and Cody and frolic till they could frolic no more singing, "Yo-ho-yo-ho!" and splicing the mainbrace!

But, Rogue had gotten the powers but could not control them!  Rogue became the new, yet unstable, Weather Wench!

"What's going on?" asked Scott.  "Shiver me timbers!"

"Too much…power…can't…control it!" Rogue gasped but then she teleported away and all the storms that we forgot the mention before faded away.

As First Mate Scott and Lass Jean attempted to revive Wench Storm, Captain Logan (carrying Hand Kurt), Captain Xavier, and Lass Kitty came onto the deck.

"Where's the Rogue?" asked Scott to Captain Xavier.

"I'm not sure." Said Captain Xavier.  "Her mind is a cat o' nine tails.  I can't trace it.  But I strongly suspect the hand of another at work here."

"Hm…" said Captain Logan, sniffing the air.  "Captain Mystique.  She can change her body but not her scent."

"Then we have to go aft her!" said Kitty.

"There's been enough damage done today." Said Captain Xavier.  "And the lass must come of her own free will or not at all.  And we must first tend to our own."

At that exact moment, both Storm and Hand Kurt were awakened.

"Looks like I missed quite a party…" Kurt said, looking around at all the damage that was done.

"Kurt, you're all right!" cheered Kitty.  Kitty nuzzled Kurt happily and all he could spit out was an absent minded, "Sink me?"

"Welcome to Bayville." Said Captain Mystique, though appearing like Madame Darkholme.  "I'm sure you'll be very happy here.  Happy and safe."

"Aye, thank you." Said Rogue, standing up and leaving the room.

Madame Darkholme changed her appearance back to Captain Mystique just as the familiar eerie voice rung through the air.

"The lass has great power," said the voice.  "She is a good addition to our crew."

"Aye, we were lucky to get to her first." Said Captain Mystique.

"Aye…" said the creepy voice.


	4. Mutant Crush

Episode 4

Mutant Crush

Due to the fact that no one likes this episode when it's not pirated, we're not even going to bother writing it because frankly, we despise it as well.  Plus, you're all in anticipation of 'Speed and Spyke' so that will make doing THIS episode that much less enjoyable.  So mainly, a son of a biscuit dog named Scurvy Fred Dukes, or 'Blob', comes to town, creates a ruckus and then Captain Mystique wants him to join _The Brotherhood. _ Meanwhile, Lass Rogue is having some difficult times since she keeps meeting up with the _X-Men _and doesn't know which way is up!


	5. Speed and Spyke

Episode 5

Speed and Spyke

The weather was stormy aboard the pirate ship, _Ghetto_.  No, there wasn't a storm, it was just the frequent quarreling between Lad Evan Daniels and Lad Pietro Maximoff.  The two had never been very buddy-buddy, but it was even worse today now that they were assigned swabbing duty together.  Storm, the Wench, had also decided to visit Evan since he was her nephew and was obsessively observing him swab.

Lad Pietro swabbed angrily while watching Lad Evan.  Pietro was a much faster swabber, but Evan was much more efficient.  Captain Coach wandered by just as Evan ran out of water.

"Pietro, give Evan some of your water!" ordered the captain.

Pietro mumbled something under his breath and gave some of his swabbing water to Evan who just kept swabbing until everything was completely spotless.

"Swab, Evan!  SWAB!!" cheered Storm way too excitedly.

Pietro got VERY angry.  The rest of the crew hoisted Evan above their head to congratulate him on his mad swabbing skills.  Storm couldn't help but observe Pietro's look of hatred as he turned his back to the group and continued swabbing his OWN half ALL ALONE!!

Later on that day, when the swabbing was done, everyone went down to their quarters.

"Good swabbin', matey!" said one crewmate as he patted Evan on the shoulder.

"Aye, matey, ye be a sutler!" another crewmate agreed as they both left to go do their duties.

"Thanks me hearties!" Evan called after them.  Pietro knew that it was his opportunity to go and yell at Evan for no reason whatsoever so he approached him.

"I shoulda known you'd hog all the glory!" said Pietro.

"What are you talkin' matey?" asked Evan.  "Everyone knows…"

"Everyone knows that if it wasn't for me then you would have run outta swabbing bilge!" Pietro interrupted.  "I knew I should have just titivated it by myself…"

"Avast, that was good swabbing, matey." Said Evan.  "But there's no way you could have finished by yourself."

"Hey, bucko, I got moves you can't even imagine." Said Pietro.  "And I'm through holding back just to make squiffies like you look good." He pushed past Lad Evan and stomped off, searching for someone else to pick on just because he knew he could.

"Seems like that lad has been competing with you ever since you were wee lads." Said Wench Storm as she rounded the corner.

"Ahoy, Auntie O!" said Lad Evan.

"I saw what you did to Pietro's swabbing half." Said Storm.  "You scratched it with that spike that shot out of your arm while your hearties were hoisting you over their heads."

"It wasn't on my accord!" said Evan.

"That's what worries me." Wench Storm said.  Evan took a few deep breaths and then sneezed, shooting hundreds of spikes out of his body and embedding them in the wall.  Luckily, they missed Wench Storm by just a smiggen bit.

"Black spotted, arrr?" said Evan nervously.

"Big time." Said Wench Storm.

Then they went to the crew party where everyone was having a grand old time stuffing their faces and laughing like jolly rogers.

"I still can't get over the way you swabbed!" said a matey to Evan.  "The ship's a beauty!"

"Aye, wasn't it exciting?" said a wench who favored Lad Evan.

Evan turned back to Wench Storm.  "What amazes me is that you've kept it concealed this long." Said Wench Storm.

"So what?" said Evan.  "This IS a pirate ship."

"Evan, you need to take this seriously." Said Storm.  "The _X-Men _welcomes mutant pirates like you and myself."

"I'm not a mutant pirate, matey!" said Evan defiantly.

"Don't you think the rest of your crew should know?" said Wench Storm.

"Can't this wait till after chores tomorrow?" asked Evan.  "We're having a party.  Don't want to ruin it."

"All right…" said Storm as Evan ran off to join the party.

_"Storm, how's it going with your effort?"_ came the telepathic voice of Captain Xavier.

_"Just as I feared, Captain.  He's being stubborn." _Storm replied.

_"Scott and Jean will arrive in the morning."_ Captain Xavier said.  _"By the way, Cerebro detected another mutant pirate on _Ghetto.  _Did you notice any lads or lasses that may be mutant pirates?"_

_"Maybe…but I'm not certain yet…"_

_"Very well.  Keep me informed."_

The next morning, Lad Evan was searching for his booty among his other stuff but they were nowhere to be found.  "Avast, not again!" Evan yelled, kicking something over.

"Something wrong?" Lad Pietro asked as he zoomed out in front of Evan.

"Where'd you come from?"

"That's a question you should be asking during chores."

"Look, I know you're fast matey." Said Evan.  "You were really a sutler yesterday."

"Blimey, so you finally accord that I'm better than you!" said Pietro.

"I said you were faster, not better." Said Evan smugly.  "I still have a few tricks of my own."

"Aye, like being ripped off for the second time this month." Pietro said, looking down at Evan's pile of booty.  "Sounds like a prow of a mystery, matey."

"Aye but I'm gonna keelhaul this scallywag!" said Evan.

"But you're gonna need some bait." Said Pietro, pulling a few doubloons from his pocket.

"Shiver me timbers, thanks, matey!" said Evan happily.  "I'll pay you back.  Catch you later."  Evan hobbled off, feeling happy.

"Not even on your best day, matey, you'll never catch me." Said Pietro so that Evan couldn't hear him, grinning a sinister grin.

"Matey, you don't give up do you, Auntie O?" said Evan when he reached the dock to see Lass Jean and First Mate Scott there.

"That's because she loves you.  She's just concerned." Said Lass Jean.

"It's really not so bad." Chimed Scott.  "Being a mutant pirate can be a bottle of rum sometimes."

"Avast, whatever." Said Evan.  "Gangway, matey.  I like it right here on _Ghetto _and I'm not going to some ship for freaks!  Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some more chores to take care of."

"Evan…" said Wench Storm.

"Well…that went well." Sighed Lass Jean.

"Aye, I thought we were really making a connection." First Mate Scott said sarcastically.

Lad Evan ran back down to the swabbies quarters and hid behind a large barrel that was most likely filled with a clap of thunder.  "All right, scallyway," said Evan, pushing a few spikes out of his body.  "You wanna play tonight?  I'm ready for you."

He sat there and waited not but for a few seconds before he felt a gust of wind.  Well, this was, of course, a very strange thing to feel a gust of wind in a completely closed in area so he knew something was fishy.  He looked around the room as everything was lifted up from the ground and flung around, being tossed in every direction.

"Shiver me timbers!!" Evan gasped, unable to even attempt to comprehend the phenomenon.  "What's going on here?  Whatever it is, belay there NOW!"  

He shot a few spikes out of his hand and the wind stops, standing there was Lad Pietro.

"Pietro?!" Evan gasped once again.

"Call me Corsair." Said Pietro proudly.  "Avast, would you look at this.  Seems my ol' matey has a few tricks of his own.  But as usual, not as good as mine!"  Pietro ran around at the speed of light, swirling the spikes up into the air and dropping them onto the ground.

"You?" said Evan, completely in awe.  "You're a mutant pirate too?"

Pietro slapped his forehead.  "Duh!" he said.  "Finally.  Remember, matey, anything you can swab, I can swab cleaner.  Mind if I take that back?"  Pietro grabbed the doubloons he had given to Evan earlier.

"But why would you want to hornswaggle me?" Evan said, sounding betrayed.

"Yanks, cranks and shanks, matey!" said the corsair.  "Belay, when you live at fast as I do, there ain't enough things to occupy my time!  I gotta entertain myself!  Arr, and you thought you could stop me.  Avast,"–then Pietro bitch slapped Evan—"Wrong again!"

"Don't bet your doubloons on it!" said Evan as he went to hurl a spike at Pietro but Pietro only ran around him and pushed him over.

"Too slow!" he said with a yawn.  "You know, I think you need some more time to work on those mutant pirate powers of yours.  Maybe I can arrange it."

"What do you mean?" said Evan angrily.

"Can you say…'scallywag'?" said Pietro as he ran off at light speed just as a bunch of the crewmen ran in to see their quarters in shambles.  It didn't take long for the crew to turn on Evan and carry him off to the brig.

He sat there wallowing in self pity when Storm the Wench, Jean the Lass and Scott the First Mate came to bust him out.

"We'll make this easy." Said Scott.  "The Captain will use his influence to get you onto _The X-Men._  But you have to give _The X-Men _a shot.  Do we have an accord?"

"Do I have a choice?" said Evan angrily.

"Avast, you always have a choice." Scott corrected.  "We just want to help you make the right one."

"Aye…we have an accord." Said Evan, shaking Scott's hand.

The next day, the crew of _The X-Men _were sitting around eating.

"So where's this new guy?" asked Lass Kitty.

"Still sleeping." Said Captain Xavier.  "He had a rather difficult evening."

"I think he knows who really scuttled those quarters." Said Scott to the Captain.

"He'll tell us when he's ready." Captain Xavier replied.

"If you ask me, he's looking to send that kid to Davy Jones' Locker personally." Captain Logan stated.

"In any case, it might be best if the lad had other things to distract his mind." Captain Xavier said.  "Perhaps some swabbing is in order, don't you agree, First Mate?"

"Aye!" said Scott.  "After that swabbing he did on _Ghetto_, I'm sure this ship will be titivated in no time!"

"Good." Said Captain Xavier.  "Then let's hope his desire for vengeance is short lived."

Meanwhile, on _The Brotherhood_, the crew, Lass Rogue, Scurvy Fred, Swab Lance and Scallywag Toad, were just waiting around until Captain Mystique was ready for them for in her Captain's Quarters, she was discussing a matter with a man of even higher rank than hers.

"I'm honored that you've come." Captain Mystique told the mystery man.

"I've not come for your crew pep talk, Mystique." He replied.  "Open your deadlights and behold."

He slammed a picture of Corsair Pietro down on the table.  Captain Mystique picked it up.  "Arr, so this is the speed demon I've been hearing about." She said, sounding pleased.

"Corsair Pietro…he is of…particular interest to me…"

The crew of _The X-Men _decided to show Lad Evan a thing or two about swabbing a deck.

"You ready, Evan?" said First Mate Scott.

"You got me here to swab, so let's swab." Said Evan in a determined tone as he held up his mop and bucket.

"You heard the lad." Said Captain Logan.  "So let's go."

Lad Evan swabbed furiously and endlessly in a very efficient yet quick manner.  It actually got to the point in which he ran out of water so he had to refill his bucket.  However, while he was running over to refill it, he slipped on some of the water and fell right on his rump.

"Not too shabby, lad." Said Captain Logan, offering Lad Evan a hand.

"Evan," came Lass Kitty's voice as she walked over.  "We're docking in Bayville soon and you have to swab tonight."

"But I just swabbed the whole deck." Said Evan.

"Yeah, it's going to be the annual swabbing competition." Kitty explained.  "All kinds of ships will be there and they'll have their best swabbers out."

Just then, Hand Kurt teleported in.  "Sink me!" he exclaimed.  "You might even end up going against _Ghetto_!"

"Aye…" said Evan as he got a look of determination in his eyes.

Lass Jean and First Mate Scott looked at each other hesitantly and frowned.

It wasn't much longer until _The X-Men _docked in Bayville alongside many other ships.  Evan waited for _Ghetto_ to arrive but it was the last ship.  He scowled angrily as Corsair Pietro stepped off, mop in hand.

"Ahoy, Corsair!" Evan yelled to get Pietro's attention.

"Blimey!" said Pietro smugly.  "Out of the brig already?"

"I'm sending you to Davy Jones's locker!!" Evan declared angrily as he attempted to grab Pietro but Pietro easily dodged.

"As usual, too slow." Said Pietro as he knocked Evan to the ground.

"Is this the lad who scuttled the quarters?" Lass Jean asked as she and the first mate approached the two.

 "Actually, aye, I scuttled the quarters!" Pietro said confidently.  "And what are you going to do about it?"

"That's it, Pietro!" yelled Evan.  "You're black spotted!"

"Ooh, sounds like a challenge!" said Pietro.  "Gangway, Daniels.  Let's see what you've got."  Pietro dropped his mop and zoomed off at the speed of light.

"Trust me, matey!" said Evan as he started running after him.  "You're gonna find out!"

"Give it up, matey!" said Pietro.  "You're outta your league!"

Evan couldn't even come close to keeping up with Pietro and only pathetically shot a few spikes at him.

"Hang the jib, say goodbye to Bayville!" Pietro declared as he ran so fast down the streets of Bayville that things got destroyed in his path.

"We have to stop him!" said Lass Jean as she got up with Lad Evan.

"I've tried, he's just too fast!" said Evan angrily.

"Jean, he can't run if his feet are off the ground!" said First Mate Scott, slamming one fist into his palm.

"Aye!" said Jean as she used her telepathy to left him off the ground.  Then, Lad Evan shot a few spikes at him, pinning him to the wall.

"I can't get loose!" the corsair yelled as he struggled in vain.  "I can't get loose!"

"Not so fast, are you, Corsair?" said Evan, crossing his arms.

"Aye, what good's it do you, matey?" asked Pietro.  "You still can't prove it was me who had anything to do with getting you the rope's end."

"Ooh, sounds like a challenge." Evan mocked as a parrot flew onto his shoulder.  "I've got it all right here."

"Actually, aye, I scuttled the quarters!" said the parrot in a voice that sounded just like Pietro's.  "And what are you going to do about it?"  Pietro glared angrily at Lad Evan.

Just then, the sound of footprints was in the air.  The _X-Men _crew quickly hurried off leaving Pietro there to face the officials and they ended up throwing him in the brig,

"Belay!" Pietro yelled, trying to get free.  "You gotta let me outta here!  I want outta here!"

Suddenly, the ground rumbled and in walked the creepy captain who had business with Captain Mystique.

"Still impatient," sighed the man.  "But you have learned much, Pietro.  And I am in need of your services."

"Ooh, sounds like a challenge." Said Pietro, seemingly intrigued.  "Aye, whatever you want!"

"Very well." Said the creepy man as he held out a hand and bent the bars of the cell back.

Aboard _The X-Men_, things were going peachy swell.  "Congratulations, lad." Praised Captain Xavier to Lad Evan.  "I understand that you've been cleared of all charges."

"Aye, thanks for your help, Captain." Said Evan.

"We're just glad to have you with us." Captain Xavier said.

"Aye." agreed Evan.


End file.
